10 things you will learn in 10 days in a B School

All examples and incidents are purely non fictional. I didn't learn many or all the lessons so just a virtual note to help others. People who can laugh with little initiative are advised to read further others go back to the first line!

Lesson:1: Read the chapter before attending the lectures.

First class in marketing,

Professor: How many have prepared for the lecture?

No hands raised.

Professor: Any specific reasons for the same?

Student from last bench: We are not mentally prepared yet Sir.

Professor: Ohhh How nice, call me to take class when you are prepared and he walks out.

Definitely male!

Welcome to Post Graduation. You have to read before the lectures and of course after the lectures. Not having text books doesn’t seem to be a good excuse.

Lesson:2:Learn Antakshari or have beer!

Highly skewed Male-Female Ratio  leads to appreciation of games like Antakshari.  Antakshari for ice breaking. For all others like me, Hail Beer!

Lesson:3: Don’t get the I-lose-the-objective syndrome.

It doesn’t matter people understand things or good at things, everyone will want to do everything. Sometimes the euphoria of being in a B School will cause you the I-lose-the-objective syndrome. So they eventually forget it’s not going to be good just because you laid your hands. It’s not what you do in a group matters, it’s what the group does as a whole matters. So lay your hands wisely else learn so that next time you can lay.

Lesson:4: Get familiarized with words like Punctuality, formal dresses and library.

You do not want to look like a fool entering a library for the first time in your life. Neither you want to be locked outside the class on the very first day. So get used to being on time, new to formal dress didn’t work for coming to class late! (grrr..am still learning to tie a tie!)

Lesson: 5: Assignments mean “You cannot ask for an extra day to complete”

Incase you are not a fan of doing “more work” or sweetly called as “Penalty assignments”, then take your assignments seriously, I mean copy or borrow but complete it. You have to submit assignments in B Schools. (I know, how stupid!)

Lesson: 6: Learn to master the art of fake laughter.

Everyone does that. Ofcourse you are not the funniest guy on earth. So others do the favour of laughing (faking) so you do the favour back and don’t be a dud! For all Duds reading this post, master the art and come back to read it again!

Lesson: 7: Learn the meaning of Networking.

Its like when you joined Kinder Garden your mom told  you: don cry beta in class. eat the biscuits from dabba and ask the teacher for susu. Same way when people enter B schools they will be told, speak with everyone you find. Maintain a rapport with everyone including the laundry wala. People keep sending and getting friend requests once they get admitted in a B school and they call it Networking. Don’t get shocked or too happy with your growing FB friends list. Your batch mates friend’s list also grew and most of them who added you doesn’t know you and you don’t look as good as you look in your FB display pic so they can’t recognise you! So adding in FB or talking with laundry wala is not networking.

Lesson:8: 5 hours of sleep is Luxury!

If you feel you don’t get enough of sleep while working or doing your UG then take back your words. Develop sense of affection towards your alarm clock.

After all you curse it if it wakes you up on time and you curse it if it doesn’t wake you up on time. (Read this somewhere so just quoting it. Don’t start like Yeah I have read this line somewhere already!)

Lesson: 9: Learn to get Bday bumps!

Incase your birthday falls in second or third week of joining college curse yourself. Everyone around will want to vent their anger on Professors, late night studies and penalty assignments on your ass. (Literally!)

Lesson:10: Learn to ask sensible questions!

Please ask questions to make the class interactive will be the most clichéd and preferred statement of every lecturer. You can be lured into asking lot of questions which is brilliant in its own way but can land you up in getting more assignments.

(dozing off thinking about my next Chennai visit……snoreeee)


16 thoughts on “10 things you will learn in 10 days in a B School

  1. 7 things you will learn abt a guy if he has joined a B-school
    1. Update on FB changes from “Works” to “Worked in ABC company” and ofcourse read his wall posts you ll know which B-school he s joined.
    2. These are the people who’s life’s priorities are re-written, changed blah 😛 and they are on a high priority mission that is gonna save the earth 😛
    3. Socialization in their dictionary is re-written to “hunt new friends” best part “in your B-school” and ofc add them on FB! 😀
    4. Get Used to hearing these words that probably you would have heard from them but from now on it starts and “is about” and ends with this : I am busy,no- time, lots of stuff to do, assignments, exams and finally a lot of sorry’s
    5. Sms them/Call them- ETA of return call/sms- well you ‘ll have to send a follow up message..Be ready for sum anger to be vented out that could make you wonder what did you just say for them to get heated up!
    6. These are the guys who are online as much as you are..except that when pinged they would be doing their assignments.
    7. Dont be suprised if you talk to them a day or two later and be asked “How are you? How’s work going? Whats new at your end??”

    😛 Aren’t they right ??? 😛

    Disclaimer- I have a lot of friends who study/have studied in B-schools written keeping in mind “all” of them :P. I am only happy these guys are atleast active on FB! – their only windows to the outside world!

      • No Raak, I didnt want to steal ur thunder and page views by writting a blog 😛 just making yours “more” interesting 😛 good pts but not good at all!!!!

  2. You cannot ask for an extra day to complete your assignments! I have been training you for this for the past 3 years! You decided to learn it the hard way you lazy *bleep*

  3. Not your usual trying to be funny kinds(which i dono y ppl find it funny!) ..This ..though doesn sound that interesting, can be read once 😛 ..
    Just one point to add.. networking doesn means making new friends,talkin to laundry walas n ervy1 as said by u, but mite lead to forgettin existing friends who soon mite b lost in contact in ur busy tight schedule!..So beware 😉

    Good luck wid ur MBA dude .. Hav fun 😉

    @Geebs- lol .. sama comedy da nee

  4. u thot ppl ll symphathize u . but it got back fired 😛 hold it on for a big write up post 1st sem … can have sufficient details to put in ..

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